Kirk Minihane Reveals: Barstool Enemy Gumbel Dangled Dead Mice in Female Subordinates' Faces (Allegedly)

Kirk Minihane Hates Hypocrites and Panderers

Kirk Minihane isn’t ready to let this HBO thing go. Last night, Barstool’s favorite guerrilla journalist did extensive research into Bryant Gumbel’s sordid past. Okay, it was just a few Google searches. But that was enough to reveal Gumbel’s own, shall we say, Laueresque past. Minihane unearths old allegations that Gumbel sexually harassed female employees and even taunted them with dead rodents. In other words, the hack lecturing Barstool Sports is a total hypocrite.

The first Democrat debate was a major disappoint for Minihane. From the “break out stars” to the more well known pols, all he saw was a stage of pandering losers. (How do you say that in Spanish?) Minihane reacts to some of the highlights, if you can call them that, from the debate and prepares for the varsity performance tonight. As a mock debate between Blind Mike and Minihane demonstrates, Minihane could easily win the Dem nomination if he gave a shit.

Bob Kraft is back in the news after some public radio dopes call for him to be stripped of a prestigious award. Minihane rips media hypocrites and defends Asian massage parlors, though he insists he’s never been to one. Blind Mike on the other hand… Speaking of Blind Mike, following his all-star stand up performance on yesterday’s show, Minihane demands a new, original set for Friday. It’s the highest stakes Mike’s ever seen in his life: Can he make Minihane laugh?

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